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Which Parenting Style Do You Have?

September 12, 2011

Have you ever done research on different parenting styles in order to choose the best one for you and your family?  Typically, parenting is something that comes naturally to most people.  Although they have manuals & books on how to parent, people generally just learn as they go.  There are many things that are second nature, like feeding, clothing and general care for a child. However, as your child grows and others are born, parenting becomes more then simply handling the child's everyday needs. Sometimes parents feel they need some help in deciding the best way to parent their children. You may not start to question your parenting style until you begin having problems with your children. It may seem like suddenly your current parenting style is no longer working.  And, being a good parent is not easy but there are skills you can learn to meet the challenge of good parenting. There are 3 basic types of parenting styles. Some authorities on the subject of parenting will argue that there are many different variations of parenting styles, but they all go back to the three basic parenting styles.  Those three styles are authoritarian, permissive and democratic. The authoritarian parenting style is based on control. Authoritarian parents don't feel they need to explain their rules or the reasons why they expect their children to do certain things.  Under this style of parenting there are strict rules and schedules. The parents rule the children with an iron fist. There is no exception to the rules and punishment is given in a very orderly and prompt fashion.  Since children raised with this parenting style are usually not allowed to think freely or make decisions on their own they often grow up to have problems with thinking for themselves. The permissive parenting style is the opposite of the authoritarian parenting style. Parents who adopt this style may have concerns that their children will not like them if they set limits.  They often see themselves as their children's friend and not their guardian who is there to guide them. These parents allow freedom with little or no responsibility.  Children without limits have no sense of responsibility, have trouble with relationships and the rights of others and can find the world a difficult place. It is unfair to raise a child without established boundaries.  Believe it or not, children appreciate limitations and tend to feel safer within an environment with set rules. The democratic parenting style is a mixture of the authoritarian and permissive parenting styles. A democratic parent will set rules that are necessary and enforce them, but they will also take each situation as it comes. Punishment is usually discussed with the child.  Democratic parents are most interested in making sure their children understands why rules are in place and why some behavior in unacceptable. Children will usually grow up to respect their parents and to be able to handle conflicts and problems in a reasonable manner. Each parenting style has its pros and cons and nobody proclaimed that parenting was easy. There really is no right or wrong to parent as long as children are cared for, happy and healthy.

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